The last few weeks have been hard. I have watched, listened to, and known of so many people I love and care for suffer. Though I do not compare my pain to theirs (what good does that do anyone anyway?) I have wept and sobbed with a broken heart because it wounds me deeply along with them. Where does this leave us when nothing at all feels well in our souls?
In being there to encourage these people I love as best I can, I have learned from them. No matter what level of loss or tragedy they have dealt with, they have not been ruled by it. In the middle of it they have ever-fixed their eyes on Jesus. In that they have been remarkable examples to me of what having all your fountains in the Lord looks like.
I want to be clear here: this does not mean that they didn’t feel the full weight of pain in their circumstance. It does mean that they pressed into and trusted Jesus beyond that pain. I learned it’s okay for things to be felt at their full weight, but I learned the value in letting our hearts be ruled by the truth of God above all things.
Tonight I have been on my face with a broken heart crying out and asking God to be comforter and healer in the middle of a tragedy that struck today. I feel the full weight of heartache in this prayer. When you’ve watched people grow up, prayed with them, watched them take steps toward walking with Jesus, and have loved them, it is okay to feel that heartache. Examples have taught me the best thing I can do tonight is feel it, but I also have to fix my eyes on Jesus and trust in Him.
Tonight my feelings won’t win or count more than what I know about the gracious Father I serve & trust in. They won’t matter more than knowing that each person who is hurting tonight knows the love of God the Father and that He is hearing our cries. Even when circumstances come with hurt, my God is still the same and I can take refuge in that. His love for us does not waiver, and we can hope and trust in Him.
My favorite hymn is It Is Well, and if you don’t know the story behind it, click on this link:
Being reminded of this song and what motivated the writer etched a lesson on my heart that those around me have helped me learn that God has been teaching others from the beginning as well. Even when it does not feel well and I feel broken, I can seek Jesus and embrace His truth that makes all things well.
“The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” – Psalm 34:18