There’s really not any pretense about who I am. What I mean by that is I’m not someone who says things I don’t mean or bends who I am to receive acceptance from others.
I lived a lot of my life trying to fit in or please people or be who I thought others would accept more easily. I refuse to ever live my life like that again, and more than that, God hasn’t asked me to.
This doesn’t mean that I have taken on the persona or attitude of a selfish or reckless or rude person, but it does mean that I am free to be who Christ has called and is calling me to be without needing to apologize for it.
That is part of sonship – knowing who God has called His sons and daughters to be. Knowing isn’t just about our opinion of what that should look like. Knowing means actually learning what God says that should look like.
I am a blood-bought heir to the kingdom of God. That is the most important part of who I am. That is the part I long to nurture so that I will better understand what life lived as a child of God who honors Him looks like.
My husband and I were driving and he said this to me:
“You can’t be blessed as a son without having the responsibility of an heir.”
That is good. That is so good. I love Rob’s heart, and that we can have conversations that lead to new revelation in my life.
“And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, ‘Abba! Father!’ So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.” – Galatians 4:6-7
As an heir and daughter, I have to know that seeking the Lord means that His ways will become my ways, and in that I can be more than okay with being who I am – not because of me but because of Him. The spirit of God actually dwells in me, and the love of Christ compels me to have my whole life shout praise to Him.
I know who I was apart from Christ. I know how lonely and sad and mean and lost I was. I remember. I don’t want to be who my way made me. I want to be who His ways are making me. I want to pursue His heart. I want Him to be my guidepost and goal.
Does this mean I am guaranteed an easy life with nice things? No. It does mean that nothing will ever separate me from Him or His love and that He will always be my loving Father and sufficient for all my needs. I will never be lost from Him or out of His reach.
Does this mean that I am done and have no work left to do? No. I love God. I long to spend time with Him. I basque in the beauty I find sitting at His feet. For all my days, I am responsible for that. I am responsible to pursue His word that it may be written on my heart, to pray in supplication and thanksgiving, to be loving and reflect His heart to the world, to rejoice in suffering and ease, to delight in discipline and comfort, to be wise in my words and deeds, and I am to see everything He has called me to as a blessing and not a burden – whether or not it looks like what I want it to.
Sons and daughters trust their Father and do not insist on their way or want above His for them – that is what disobedient brats do. If I am to live like an heir, I have to own the responsibility that comes with it and not just want the things the mind of man measures as good. It can’t be about me. It always has to be about Him and His Kingdom.
I can honestly say that moving away has been incredibly difficult, but through the crushing that has occurred in it, I can see where Christ has led me to be a daughter who depends on her Father and trusts Him and His plan more than anyone’s. The foundations that have been built into my mind and heart in this season have come at great cost, but coming through the other side, I am thankful for what I see has been established in me for His namesake. In the middle of it, it’s hard to imagine ever being thankful for the pain, but I am today because I know and see how it was used for my good and His glory.
Our sonship is freedom to set our hearts and minds on God, to delight in Him as His very own, to share His heart and gospel, and to know and enjoy Him forever. Our sonship isn’t about us, but a reflection of the heart of grace to a world that doesn’t know what that means.
Our sonship is ours to enjoy, but it can’t and shouldn’t end with us. It isn’t a story about us, but about a good, good Father who adopted us into His family and gives us the freedom and joy to burst at the seams to live lives that testify to that truth. Sons and daughters of God, be wise in this and don’t waste it by making it anything besides a grace freely given you neither were entitled to or earned.